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The following conversation took place between my wife and I earlier today:

Her:  Why is all this laundry sorted out in separate piles?

Me:  Because that’s how you’re supposed to do laundry.

Her:  …  (grumpy face)

This is also after I got home from SETC to find that she had done laundry by just throwing everything into the washer and turning it on.  Also, drying (partially) everything all together, too.

Have I spoiled her so much by doing the laundry that she has totally forgotten all this stuff?  I have actually told her to step away from the laundry and to get out of the kitchen (when I’m cleaning it).  She is spoiled absolutely rotten.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

17 years ago tomorrow, Bekah and I will celebrate our first date. Some of you might ask what we are planning for our celebration. Well, it’s funny. We’re going to spend it apart. She’s going down to Chattanooga to hang out with some old friends from high school and I’m staying here to work on audiobooks.

Happy Anniversary, Bekah! I’m glad you have finally reconnected with your high school friends. I know you’re going to have a great time!

I know you’re tired of hearing this, but…sorry it’s been so long.  I had surgery on my heel and recovery has seemed slow (even though the doctor tells me that recovery is happening at a very quick pace).  I have no excuse.  I’ve been sitting still with my foot in an AirCast for almost a month now.

Anyway, here’s the reason for this post:

This is my new favorite picture of Bekah.  I know it’s not a recent shot of her, but this picture has meaning that goes much deeper.  First of all, the picture was taking just before she graduated from high school.  She’s sitting in her grandmother’s living room.  That living room now happens to be our living room.  We bought our home from her when she moved to Louisiana a couple of years ago.  Second, Bekah is sitting in a chair that we also inherited as part of the purchase of the home.  That chair now sits in our bedroom reading area.  Third and finally, it’s a beautiful picture of her.

I found this picture while going through some pictures at her parents’ house a couple of months ago.  We scanned them in so she could post a bunch of them on Facebook.  I liked this picture right away just because of her, but when I finally got a chance to look at it, I realized exactly what I was looking at.  The chair she’s sitting in in the picture is in almost the exact same place facing in almost the exact same angle and sitting in the very same room as the chair that I sit in as I type these words.

A whole lot has happened since this photograph was taken.  She met me and, thankfully, fell in love with me.  How I pulled that one over on her, I’ll never know.  We married, moved to Dallas for a while, got me though grad school, had two beautiful children, and have since moved back to where it all began.  This picture for me, represents a very concrete definition of the phrase “full circle.”

Anyway, I’m sentimental and romantic that way and just thought I had to share.

Getting a little more personal now…

Can we dim the lights a little?  Thank you.

Bekah and I have been married for…(pause while I do math)…13 years now; dating for…(another pause) 16.  We’ve been through a lot in that time.  For the most part, though, I’d say we have a very happy marriage.  Let’s be honest, every couple has their ups and downs.  Thankfully, we’ve mostly had ups.  I mean there are things about me that drive her absolutely insane and there are things about her that do the same to me.  For the sake of enjoying my king-sized bed and having a lumpy couch, I’ll not itemize those things here.

Anyway, about 5 or 6 months ago, Bekah and I instigated Date Night.  Full disclosure:  it was her idea.  I got chastised the other day for saying

Date Night is the best idea we’ve had in a long time.

The correct statement should’ve been

Date Night is the best idea you’ve had in a long time.

I’ll not make that mistake again.

But I digress.

The concept is simple:  we set aside one night every week that is ours.  It’s not always easy to do with her working retail and me professing theatre, but we actually take the time to put Date Night in our calendars.  Since the budget is tight, we don’t feel like we have to go out to a fancy dinner (or even a take-out/drive-thru dinner).  We cook either for or with each other, eat in peace after the kids are in bed, and then spend some quality time focusing on each other.

I won’t go into all the details of what Date Night involves.  I’m sure most of you are adults and can use your imagination. Plus, going into more detail would put me in danger of sleeping on the patio or worse. However, I will tell you that, even when we don’t or can’t get a babysitter, we still have Date Night.  We just wait until we’ve put the kids to bed and then we have our time together.  We usually turn the ringers off on the phones.  We are very selfish with that time.  Nothing supercedes Date Night. We usually try to keep it the same night every week, but sometimes that just can’t happen.  We don’t let a week go by without having at least one night that is totally ours.

The best part about Date Night is…okay the second best thing about Date Night is that regardless of anything else, we know that there is one night that we can have to be Real People; not Parents, Teachers, or Co-Workers.

And you know what?  It’s really improved our marriage.  Not that our marriage was perfect, but there’s always room for improvement, right?  It’s drawn us closer together; allowed us to get to know one another all over again; remember the cute little things that made us crazy for the other one while we were dating; and, yes, even learn a few new things about each other.

What’s the secret?  There isn’t one.

Other than taking the time and making it absolutely sacred.  Rarely do we have any kind of plan for the evening.  We usually fly by the seat of our pants and make it up as we go.  Every now and then one of us will get a wild idea and try to surprise the other one with something, but neither of us feels like we have to do that.  There is no pressure whatsoever.

Okay.  I’ve got to go.  Tonight is Date Night and I’ve got to go finishing getting ready.  Don’t bother calling tonight.  We won’t answer the phone.